The Best 63 on a Videoke Machine Ever

I'm not entirely sure where to start with this story so I'll just jump in from the beginning. I was roused from a nap by my host dad who tells me about an engagement party of a former student of his. He’d mentioned this previously but I’d forgot...you ever forget? Happened to me. He’d asked permission if I could come and they said suuuuure; so I was going. Apparently Filipinos don’t really do engagement parties either, my host family had never heard of one much less been to one. Not only that, but I had woken up at 5 am that morning in order to participate in a charity walk, sans breakfast mind you, and was quite tired by 6 pm and not at all enthused about the prospect of doin the meet and greet routine where we get the same five questions every time.

1) Are you a mormon?
2) Oh you speak Illongo?
3) How long have you lived here?
4) Are you single?
5) What do you think of Filipinos?

They’re not always in that order, but it’s pretty standard material. I went along anyways though. We arrived half an hour late, but the couple had yet to arrive and there were about ten people there out of five tables set for fifty. I was not enthused at that moment to be sittin there waiting for the party to begin whilst yawning away with bugs buzzing around like mad; you can imagine why… (venus flytrap). They had Lechon Baboy on the table though so there was at least the promise of good food.

The couple showed up eventually and they were very young and happy which was nice, although it inevitably led to this conversation:

Bride to Be (BtB): “Are you married?”
Me: “No, I am single.” (see the five questions we always get above)
Host Dad: “He has not found the girl yet” (chuckle chuckle)
Me: “Oh, I am too young to get married”
Host Dad to the BtB: “How old are you?”
BtB: “Twenty-one” (awkward laughter)
Me: “Maybe someday later.”
BtB: “Yes, you are enjoying life single” (awkward pause)
Host Dad: “He needs to find a Filipina, one who’s not engaged!” (extremely awkward chuckles)

I’m fairly certain this is a universal Peace Corps experience, and Especially in the Philippines. They love to throw Americans, and each other too, into awkward positions so they can laugh about it. It’s something you just smile and laugh along with because there’s no real other option.

People continued to meander in, seemingly as if by accident, and eventually the program began. They had the Groom to Be give a little impromptu speech to express his love, which started with a lot of smiles and laughter. It was in Hiligaynon so I was trying to follow but could only pick out snatches of the speech. I understood that their relationship began when she borrowed 20 pesos from him in High School. I was struggling to follow and then I realized that he’d paused, and was crying, and EVERYONE there was crying except me who probably had that stupid bewildered face you make when the teacher calls on you and you’ve got no idea what the tangent of the sin variable in relation to the hyperbole (Math was never my forte…). I switched from smiling face to sad contemplative face and tried to look somber. I still don’t know exactly what he said but it had a profound effect on the gathering. The Bride to Be followed with a similar monologue, of which I understood almost nothing but there was more laughter and crying again, and again I correlated my facial expressions.

After the speeches the couple had a dance together, to the lovely music of a videoke machine, and then the time came for the proposal. They wanted to use the mic but the only way to use the mic was to have the videoke machine playing a song. So he got down on a knee, they turned on a song, and he proposed. I really couldn’t believe it was happening…a proposal through/over a videoke song. Only in the Philippines. I thought it was hilarious and loved it. He scored a 63 on the song, which if you know anything about videoke you know is really really low, but hopefully he’ll do better on the Husband part right? Har har har.

Next was dinner and so for our background music on the night there was more videoke songs in the background. The first song after the proposal and going into dinner? My Heart Will Go On. I couldn’t help but laugh out loud at this. Partially due to the cheese factor, but mostly because amongst my friends in the States a stirring verse of “Near, Far, Wherever you are!” was our go to move for awkward silences.

We left after dinner and congratulating the engaged couple. I really, despite my fatigue and misgivings at the start, enjoyed the night. The couple was extremely welcoming and gracious. I enjoyed meeting them and wish them the best in the future and it’s a fantastic story for me to tell about the time I went to a Filipino Engagement party.